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"Motherhood has saved me 200,000 kr in therapy hours," said a colleague once said to me when we worked together at a treatment center for neglected children, some years ago. She thought aquaculture jobs that when we are aware of our own development aquaculture jobs and encounter challenges in our parenting, there is great opportunity to gain deep insights about ourselves in relation, to let go of old baggage and to learn a lot about ourselves. So if we are open to looking at it. Among the most valuable, but perhaps least appreciated the experiences it has to be a parent gives us is the opportunities that arise to explore, aquaculture jobs relive and let go of our own childhood problems. In our relationship with our child creates many opportunities for this, but they often come in a disguise of situations that frustrate us and create conflicts between us. We carry our own unresolved aquaculture jobs conflicts on our children. If we take the chance in such situations to examine what causes us to react and behave so, perhaps we can resolve the conflicts from our childhood that we have not previously resolved. You know it perhaps? You say to yourself that you will do everything possible to never be like your own mother. Or that you will never do things like your father did. And BAM! So you sit in the trap, and you hear yourself saying just the same in stressful situations aquaculture jobs with your child. Especially with older children and teenagers can your old shadows come out of the closet. Here it may be booming hard to see that it is your very own personal reaction to the situation with your child. That is something that happens to you. And not your child or teenager who is to blame for your response. Your part of the conflict is what you bring into it with the feelings and reactions you have right there. It is reasonable, and seems easiest to point to your child. "He's completely impossible" "My teenager dominates so much and there is simply no room for us," "She has filled so much since she was little," "She is so difficult and dramatic" is the word I often hear in my business as a family therapist from parents who are frustrated with their children and teenagers. And yes, it is enough parent-child relationship that can get through the nervous aquaculture jobs system most lit and dark sides of the game. Both as own parent and to one's own aging parents. It was no good up when we leave home: -)
Grandmother also needs I was inspired to this article when I noticed how much I was triggered by my own mother's way, to be on with my daughter. aquaculture jobs And my daughter's reaction to my mother. My mother said one day to her: "You have been so great that you are completely indifferent aquaculture jobs to me" (guilt with guilt). I said, "Mom, what do you mean what you say?" "Well, she will not at all hug more when we meet." My daughter was upset, withdrew and closed in like an oyster. Just like I did when I was a child. I became angry, hit and quiet. After some time, when I had released, I thought it was annoying aquaculture jobs that she often said, I asked her: "What was your desire really to say what you said?" aquaculture jobs "I miss her and just might as well think me a hug" my mother said. So was my daughter's fast and said to her: "But Grandma, if it is a hug you want, then do not say it so negatively. I will'd aquaculture jobs really like to give you a hug. "
The feelings that are being revived in such situations, in ourselves as a parent's toad old. For both parties. I learned a little more here with my elderly mother that she does her best and deep down also want to be near, but just have a hard time expressing it. Like when I was little. You cut to the bone, we have probably all much more comfortable in our relationships when we: 1. Have the freedom to say what we need, 2. Expresses what we want and 3. Saying what we miss ... Without doing the other wrong at the same time. My mother has not quite learned it yet. I have had to learn it as an adult and practicing me still every day, my own children will hopefully easier it. And we can together help each other to break patterns. One step at a time.
We trigger on its own sex I know from theory that is often most ambivalence in children compared to the parent of the same sex. As a mother-daughter trigger we more apart. And the father-Sundays relationship happens immediately. We are in fact more likely to relive difficult pages of our own relationship with our parent aquaculture jobs of the same sex. Therefore, it is very likely that we as mothers will grab ourselves to speak our own mother when she criticized us, while the father repeats the negative interaction, which was present in your own childhood between you and your father. According to research our family has every 4 Dane no contact with their family, on